ashamed

ashamed — adjective

1. feeling bad and sorry because you have done something wrong, or because of a par

1.adjectiveB1
Definition

feeling bad and sorry because you have done something wrong, or because of a part of your character or life you wish were different

Example

Kenji was ashamed of shouting at his younger brother during dinner.

ashamed of + -ing

I'm ashamed that I forgot my mother's birthday two years in a row.

ashamed that + clause

Common collocations
  • deeply ashamed
  • secretly ashamed
  • ashamed of yourself
  • feel ashamed
  • nothing to be ashamed of
Synonyms
  • guilty

    focuses on the inner sense of having done wrong; 'ashamed' adds the wish to hide the fact

  • remorseful

    stronger and more formal; suggests deep, lasting regret over harm caused

  • embarrassed

    milder and more social; about losing face rather than moral wrong

Antonyms
  • proud

    the direct opposite — pleased rather than sorry about your actions or qualities

  • unashamed

    openly unapologetic about something others might condemn

Grammar Patterns

ashamed of + noun/-ing

ashamed to + infinitive

ashamed that + clause

Usage Note

Predicative only — say 'she felt ashamed', never 'an ashamed woman'. For an attributive form, use 'embarrassed' (e.g. 'an embarrassed silence'). Almost always followed by 'of', 'to', or 'that'; bare 'ashamed' without a complement is rare.

Common Mistakes

She gave me an ashamed look.
She gave me an embarrassed look.
'ashamed' cannot stand before a noun; use 'embarrassed' for that position.
I am ashamed for my mistake.
I am ashamed of my mistake.
the standard preposition is 'of', not 'for'.

2. holding back from doing something because you would feel embarrassed or judged i

2.adjectiveB2
Definition

holding back from doing something because you would feel embarrassed or judged if other people noticed you doing it

Example

Pia was ashamed to ask her teacher to repeat the question a third time.

ashamed to + infinitive (reluctance)

Anaya was ashamed to tell his parents he had failed the driving test again.

ashamed to + verb of disclosure

Common collocations
  • ashamed to ask
  • ashamed to admit
  • ashamed to say
  • ashamed to tell
  • too ashamed to
Synonyms
  • embarrassed

    very close in meaning here, and more common in everyday speech

  • reluctant

    neutral about the reason; 'ashamed' specifies that shame is what holds you back

  • shy

    weaker; suggests general timidity rather than fear of judgment over a specific act

Antonyms
  • willing

    ready to do the thing without holding back

  • proud

    happy to be seen doing the thing, not hiding it

Grammar Patterns

ashamed to + infinitive

Usage Note

Distinct from sense 1: here the person has done nothing wrong yet — shame is what stops them from acting. Almost always 'ashamed to + verb' (especially 'ask', 'admit', 'say', 'tell'). Cannot be used attributively.

Common Mistakes

He was ashamed asking for help.
He was ashamed to ask for help.
this sense takes 'to + infinitive', not '-ing'.

Word family

Synonym discussion

Sense: adjective/1

All four words describe an uncomfortable feeling tied to one's own behaviour, but they sit on different points of a moral and social scale. 'Embarrassed' is the lightest and most social: you feel it when you trip in public or call a stranger by the wrong name — no real wrong has been done. 'Ashamed' is heavier; it implies that you, or some part of you, has fallen below a standard you accept, and you would rather others not know. 'Guilty' centres on the inner knowledge of having harmed someone or broken a rule, and can exist even with no audience. 'Remorseful' is the most formal and the strongest, suggesting lasting sorrow over real harm caused. Compare: 'I was embarrassed when my phone rang in the meeting' (mild, social), 'I'm ashamed of how I spoke to her' (moral, private), 'He felt guilty for lying to his boss' (rule-breaking), 'The driver was remorseful after the crash' (deep, lasting).

ashamed ↗embarrassed ↗guilty ↗remorseful

Common collocations

Adverbs

Phrases

  • nothing to be ashamed of
  • ashamed of yourself
  • feel ashamed
  • make somebody ashamed

Prepositions

Etymology

Proto-GermanicOld EnglishMiddle EnglishEnglish

From Old English 'ofsceamod', the past participle of 'ofsceamian' meaning 'to put to shame'. The prefix 'a-' here is a worn-down form of the older 'of-' (an intensifier), and the root 'shame' has been part of English since its earliest written records, with cognates across the Germanic languages. By Middle English the spelling had settled into 'ashamed', used almost exclusively after a linking verb — a predicative-only pattern that has stayed remarkably stable for nearly a thousand years.